Family

Its sad to say that im not close to anyone in my family anymore. Barely talk to my sister or brother, always quarreling with the parents. Dont like to be at home most of the time. When im at home im either in my room or asleep. Kind of wonder hw it became like this. I use to be so organised like everything in order and stuff, now im too lazy or just down right messy. Things have changed, for me its not for the better. My dad's bday at home recently, didnt do much talking. Just sit down and eat. Use to joke and talk and tell them about stuff. Dont do that anymore. I think ive still got alot bottled up inside of me and have yet to let it out and talk to anyone. Have yet to be able to open up. I actually kind of feel better keeping things to myself. Its better that nobody knows the true you or the real you rather. You never know who you can trust nowdays. You know how when youve got lots to whine or in trouble and you can turn to someone and talk or ask for advice. I use to have that friend but not anymore. And i can say ive been doing rather good not talking so much about whats going on. Just always put on the joker front and let everybody think your happy and make them all laugh and smile. Its kind of sad when u see other people close to their families and friends and you dont have that with your own. But i only blame myself for blocking people out. And oh well. thats life. just people making mistakes and not learning..just repeating them.