Choices

Did research this whole week..searching for diff schls and stuff so that i can start my studies asap..Found a few schls on both counselling and cooking..Of course my major intrest is cooking but if i could do counselling as well it will be a big bonus to me. Talked to a few friends who were classmates who did the course and had good feedback, but havent really heard any good feedback from the people that i want to hear it from..as in my close frens or family memebers. Non really supportive and non willing to help me go further into checking out more stuff..obviously there are stuff and questions that i didnt ask, scared that ill once again choose the wrong path.. Im eager to start my studies and get on with life. At least then ive got something to do and something to keep me company. I dont want to haev nothing on me when i come out of the army..At least a diploma cert or something..Sigh...There are many times i think about doing things and wether its all worth it.. Where do i pick up from here? What do i do? Lots of stuff but no one to talk to..I tot having a blog ill be able to express what i feel and so much more..i am able to do that..but the only bad thing is.. i dont get replies from my questions..Time is not on my side...everyday i feel like im wasting time...Aarrghhhh f**k.. im so irritated with myself...got so much problems and things going through my head that i keep running away from..and most of the time im angry....always angry and moody nowdays..no patience for stuff...making stupid choices and making big mistakes....Is shit feeling waking up and always feeling like shit... things got to change soon..